After weeks of deliberation, consternation, persuasion, dissuasion, some equations, and voter sequestration, I can now make my way out of Swoops HQ with the Season 0 All-Star results.
I cannot impress upon the community how seriously this voting was taken. Everyone has their opinions of what an All-Star is or should be and each of these thoughts, as well as the thoughts and feelings of all the team owners, were taken into consideration during this process. How much should we weight per game stats vs. totals, should team record or win percentage be a factor, what about the popularity of players, or the portability of players?
Since these are players are going into a pool of twenty (8 guards, 8 forwards, 4 centers) for our All-Star captains to choose from in a draft this weekend, we were able to come to the conclusion that we should skew towards the best players of Season 0. That way each team is given a chance to draft a formidable team, with no weak links, and no odd outliers that could put a captain at a disadvantage.
While that felt fair, the criteria for All-Stars is still one that can only be agreed upon democratically at the end of the day, so the votes were tallied up, we all accepted the results, and our interoffice version of 12 Angry Men had come to an end. Every Swoopster felt well deserving of the honor and we could finally make it home to our families, pets, and/or beds.
So without further ado...I am proud to announce the inaugural, the first of many, the well deserving, Season 0 All-Stars!
Johnny Phive - Mile High Knights
It should come as no surprise that Johnny Phive has made it in as an All-Star. Even the Swoops All-Star Committee had no trouble putting him in, as he was one of four unanimous selections.
The Season 0 scoring champion launches into the All-Star game averaging a staggering 32 points per game for the Mile High Knights and has been in the MVP conversation for nearly the entire season.
Phive is the preeminent offensive force at the guard position. Not only is he our scoring champion who is 1st in FGM per game at 12.58, 1st in 2PTM at 10.02, but he is tied for the 2nd most points scored in a single game with 64, is one of thirteen Swoopsters to record an individual game score over 50, and is somehow averaging less than 3 turnovers per game despite the immense offensive responsibility he bears for the Knights.
Congratulations to our scoring champion and we can't wait to see if you'll lead your All-Star team to a championship as well.
Doge McDermott - Globe TRONers
Doge McDermott has had one of the more noteworthy seasons of any Swoopster in the Swoops universe. He first leapt onto the scene as the series MVP of the 7-part Globe TRONers vs. Robellion super-series earlier in the season, scoring boat loads of points, bringing his team back from the brink of defeat, and establishing himself as the premier volume-3pt shooter in all of Swoops.
From there, Doge went on to win the first 24hr challenge in the Swoops Universe when he totaled 54,838 points in the span of a day. A mark that is still hard to begin to comprehend.
Since then Doge's stock has steadily remained atop the league. He's 20th in PPG, one of a select group of players to have a game score over 49, and has all but secured the #1 spot for 3PM per game at 4.65.
Congrats to Doge and the TRONers and we'll be watching to see if you have another legendary series in you.
Larry Password - Swish Beatz
Larry Password is one of the most fascinating stories in all of Season 0. Initially rolled out of Swoops HQ as Swoopster-579, Larry sat in a holding facility for months on end as team owners passed by and fawned over the unicorn-like profile of the 5-star guard. Dozens of offers were made for the Swoopster but fell on deaf ears, until Swish Beatz blew them out of the water and snagged the guard for a (still) record 1.5 ETH.
It has been a purchase well worth the price tag as Password currently sits as the 3rd highest scorer in all of Swoops at ~28ppg, is 7th in FGM per game at a shade under 10, top-30 in 3PM per game, and one of only 6 players to have 62 or more points in a single game.
What started as a mysterious Swoopster lying in wait has become one of the shining stars of the Swoops Universe. Larry Password is still just scratching the surface of how great of a player they are, and Swish Beatz are poised to improve as a team alongside their franchise player.
Daemon Thrillard - Kirchhoff's Electric Society
Daemon Thrillard of Kirchhoff's Electric Society is built for the All-Star game. While Thrillard is one of the most potent scorers in all of Swoops, currently sitting at 5th in the league in PPG, 4th in FGM per game, and 7th most 2PTM per game, he may be more known for his late game heroics.
The "Clutch Battery" as he's become known has pulled off improbable feats of scoring to bring KES to some wins that seemed all but out of reach. That clutch-chip inside of Thrillard was on full display during the KOD community tournament where the guard earned Tournament MVP honors and established himself as perhaps the most clutch player in the Swoops Universe.
We are beyond excited to see what kind of miraculous moments he'll have during the Swooper Bowl for Kirchhoff's Electric Society and during the All-Star tournament as well.
Tronovan Mitchel - Star Gods
Tronovan Mitchel is one of the few All-Stars to be traded during Season 0 as the MetaCourt Miners moved him to the Star Gods this April. Through Season 0, for both teams, Mitchell has spent 8 weeks on the MVP ladder and is without a doubt one of the most well-rounded and dangerous players in all of Swoops.
Mitchel is 6th in 3PT% among qualified (min. 100 GP) players and the only player averaging 46% or more from three while averaging 20 or more points per game. A percentage that is really only conceivable for tertiary options on the wing, Mitchel has somehow found a way to be the 16th most efficient player in all of Swoops as the focal point on offense.
On the season Mitchel has not only been one of the most potent 3PT shooters, but has recorded over 20 or more triple-doubles as well, flashing the all-around game that really sets Mitchel apart from other snipers.
Sporting a near 6:1 A:TO ratio, Mitchel has lead the Star Gods to one of the best records in all of Swoops and will be a fantastic pick for any All-Star captain this year to lead their squad into battle.
Amaterasudo - Legends
Amaterasudo is an extraordinarily potent scorer who has somehow managed to fly under the radar this year despite nearly 9000 games played. The Legends' scoring battery sits at 14th in the league in PPG right now, has the fourth most points scored in a single game with 62, and the 4th best game score in Swoops history with his 53 GSC masterpiece earlier in the year.
Amaterasudo is not just one of the best scorers in Swoops, but is one of the most aggressive rebounders from the guard position as well. At a Westbrookian 8.5 boards per game, Amaterasudo has put up the 25th most double-doubles this season. That's tough!
'Sudo also chips in 4 assists a night and a fantastic 2 steals per game as well, the former helping him snag 28 triple-doubles on the year, and the latter putting him in 9th place for most seals in a game with 9 swipes.
Above all else, Amaterasudo proves that your prospect rating is not the be-all and end-all of a Swoopsters development, as he has launched past projections and is truly one of the Swoops Universe's best players.
Jim Halbot - Dunker Mifflin
Jim Halbot has been an absolute league staple since game 1 of Season 0. Halbot has been a top-10 to 15 scorer since launch day and has led the Dunker Mifflin team to victory against many a warehouse crew.
Halbot has notably found a way to deliver big games many times during Season 0, perhaps when Pam Botley shows up to watch. Jim has the 10th best individual game score in history at 52.2, has multiple 50-point+ games, and has been dishin' and swishin' alongside those performances as well.
This top-15 scorer is also a top-15 passer in the league at 7 assists per game. Halbot is very much Swoops version of James Harden. While the defense may not be there every night, you can count on a stat-stuffed, long-distance, teammate-involving game from him more often than not.
Diamond - Pirates
The Diamond of the Pirates treasure chest rounds out our 8-guard selection for the All-Star game. The crown jewel of all-around game from the guard position, Diamond is cut to perfection to be a player that simply does whatever a team needs.
Need some scoring? 18-19 points a game is not too shabby. Need rebounding? Diamond is going to get you nearly 11 boards a game...from the guard position. Need a point guard who can help get everyone involved? Diamond is going to toss out 6-7 assists a night on average and spread the wealth. Last but not least, Diamond's 83 perimeter defense ensures the Pirates have an option to lock-in to whatever potent perimeter scorer is on the other side of the jump ball every night.
Diamond has the 4th highest triple-double% in the league, netting one in nearly 7% of their games. That's led to the 4th most triple-doubles in Swoops history at 317, and the 26th most double-doubles at 2944.
Diamond may not be the sexiest pick for an All-Star team, but he may very well end up being the pick that ends up winning a team the tournament.
Timmy Dao - Unchained Web
Headlining the forwards selection is the first of two forwards who were unanimously voted into the All-Star game, Unchained Web's Timmy Dao.
Dao is an absolute beast down low, especially on the boards. Dao is 4th among qualified players in rebounds per game, one of only 12 Swoopsters to record a 30-rebound game, one of only 9 to secure 16 offensive rebounds in a single game, has the 9th most double-doubles in all of Swoops, and has the 2nd highest double-double rate at nearly 86% of his games!
Not only does Dao vacuum up rebounds like we colaborated with Dyson in his design, but he's also tossing in a respectable 17 points per game at a fantastic 53% from the field. While that may not be lead-leading numbers, Dao has it in him to put up big scoring nights and is one of only a handful of bigs to score over 50 points in a game so far.
All of this may be secondary to Dao's absurd talent as an interior defender and fantastic BBIQ, both of which have helped Unchained Web to becoming one of the best teams in Swoops and making Dao one of the top-15 Swoopsters by win% in the league so far.
Dao is no doubt going to be one of the first forwards off the board, if not one of the first Swoopsters, and for good reason.
Posty McBuckets - North Side 416ers
The second forward who was unanimously voted into the All-Star game and third of four Swoopsters in total is none other than Posty McBuckets - the North Side 416ers franchise big man who has as good of a shot as anyone to take home Season 0's MVP.
Posty has spent 8-weeks on the MVP ladder and that's not about to change any time soon. The big Bucket is 8th in points per game, 5th in TS%, 5th in FTM per game, and has had some monster individual performances. Posty owns the 11th highest individual game score game at 52.2 and is tied for the most points ever scored in a single game at 62. Without a doubt the best scoring big in Swoops.
Those are hardly empty stats as well. Posty boast(ies)s the 14th best win% in the league at 73.21% and is 9th in total wins (as of the morning of this article he's at 7103). The North Side 416ers are an absolute juggernaut and Posty is the general that leads them into battle, backing down every team that they come into contact with, and sending them home packing like Shaq on Chris Dudley.
It wouldn't surprise me if Mr. McBuckets was the first Swoopster off the board during the All-Star draft.
Gotta B Dashews - The Metahearse
The Metahearse's Gotta B Dashews is a player who I feel has slipped through the cracks a little bit. This two-star prospect forward has overshot their projections big time and landed as the Swoopster with the 8th most FGM per game this year, the 5th most 2PTM per game, and is comfortably a top-3o scorer.
Every time GBD laces them up he's bound to make something happen. If it isn't the scoring it's a great night rebounding, as he's putting up 10 a game and is one of only 22 Swoopsters to have 25 or more DREBs in a game. That's given him the 15th most double-doubles this season.
If it's not that, he's going to lock in on defense. At 81 IDEF and 77 PDEF, GBD is an elite switchable forward which ends up in him having nights where he snags 8 steals, or 7 blocks, or just irratates another team like a cyborg Jarred Vanderbilt.
An elite BBIQ and Leadership player, the Metahearse have found a serious gem in the rough with this Swoopster, as will any captain who snags him in the draft this year.
Shaq Cryptoneal - Boston Blockchains
Speaking of Swoopsters who can go out and help a team win in any number of ways, the Boston Blockchains Shaq Cryptoneal is one of the best multi-tool assets in the league.
While Cryptoneal does not stand out as elite in any one part of the game, his value comes in showing no weaknesses either. 19 points per game is much better than roleplayer value, and getting there while shooting nearly 40% from three as a forward is fantastic. Can't send him to the line either because he's making 81% of his freebies.
Want to stifle his scoring? No problem. Cryptoneal is a capable passer whose 5 assists a game are more than some starting point guards this year and allows him to be used as a pivot-point for an offense a-la Domantas Sabonis.
Speaking of Sabonis, Cryptoneal is also gonna snag you nearly 12 boards a night on both ends. A fantastic mark for any player, let alone a forward, let alone a forward you can pop in your three spot who is going to shoot 40% from three and net you five assists a game.
This all-around game from Cryptoneal has resulted in him being 3rd in the league in triple-doubles this year, one of only 24 Swoopsters to record a double-double in over 70% of their contests, and has helped the Boston Blockchains be one of the better teams in the entire league - as he will do for his All-Star team.
Big Blue - Killer Bytes
Big Blue! The Killer Bytes have lobbied for their monster-in-the-middle and, while it was not needed, it was certainly heard. Big Blue was all but a no-doubter as the best rebounder in all of Swoops makes it in to the All-Star game where his team owner (and one of the four captains!) is assuredly going to take him.
At 16.7 rebounds per game, Big Blue is Season 0's rebounding champion. It's not just the every day glass cleaning that Big Blue does that's impressive, but his ability to lock in and simply not allow other teams to even get a chance at a board. Big Blue is such a Rodman-like rebounder that he will likely end the season with the top-3 rebound performances of all time at 33, 33, and 37(!!!) boards in a single game. This has resulted in Big Blue being our likely season 0 leader in highest double-double% at 88.26% - good lord!
B.B. Board King is also no slouch on defense. He's tied for most blocks in a single performance at 9, one of only seven Swoopsters to register a double digit steals performance, and is going to be one of the most fun anchors to watch in this All-Star game.
Degen King - Knights of Degen
Speaking of anchors, the Knights of Degen's anchor in Degen King has done a fantastic job at holding down the castle for his team all season.
DK is one of only two Swoopsters in the entire league to average 20 points and 13 or more rebounds per game, resulting in the 13th most double-doubles on the season, the 8th highest double-double% at 81%, and making him the Swoops version of Zach Randolph - the other Degen King.
Degen King's efficiency from the floor and three has made him a dangerous three level scorer who can get it done inside after his monsterous ~5 ORBs per game, his sweet spot in the mid range, or from downtown.
Perhaps the most telling stat for DK's impact is not one you'll see on the box score, but rather one that you can feel in how his teams perform around him. His 98 leadership makes him one of, if not the greatest leader in Swoops at the moment. That is someone that KOD definitely wants to hold onto, but may also be the secret sauce to take an All-Star team to victory lane.
Captain - CTown Captains
Speaking of leaders, one of the most interesting picks of All-Star is none other than the Captain of the CTown Captains. Like his name suggests, Captain has come in as one of the best leaders in our sport and has lived up to that since the very first day of Swoops.
Not every player on this list has been playing in the league since day 1, but Captain sure has, and as much as his leadership has been a major point of emphasis for him as a player, it may not come close to the efficiency.
Captain's galactic 97 2PT-INT rating has enabled him to become one of only two Swoopsters to average over 22 points per game while shooting over 50% from the field. On top of that, Captain has been getting a pretty rough whistle, because despite taking the 15th most 2PTers per game he's also one of only nine Swoopsters to average over 22 points per game while making less than three free throws a game - most of which are 3pt snipers.
Captain is sort of like if someone attached rockets to Klay Thompson's legs. Now, on top of being a a deadly outside shooter, he's capable of pulling off Anthony Edwards-level dunks on teams as well. This elite combo of volume scoring and efficiency made Captain a worthy choice for All-Star and will be a great pick for any team looking to go offense-heavy in the All-Star tournament.
Big Bot Energy - The King and the Duck
The last of our picks at forward is Big Bot Energy, The King and the Duck's defense-anchoring, board-hoarding genius.
Big Bot Energy joins Degen King as the only other player to average over 20 points and 13 rebounds per game. Over the course of the season this ~20/14 behemoth of a Swoopster has netted the 24th most double-doubles, which seems great, but is even better when accounting for the fact he has the 3rd highest double-double% in the league at ~85%.
Big Bot has been regularly taking down 20 boards a game this season, snagging 20/20 games, and stifling opposing centers on both ends of the floor. It's just damn difficult to deal with a player who is going to put 20 points on you every night, and then turn around and play elite defense on the other end. Defense that isn't just fantastic because of his innate abilities as an interior defender, but because BBE has one of the best BBIQs in all of Swoops.
Big Bot Energy's big brain energy has resulted in a ton of wins for The King and the Duck who have regularly appeared atop the weekly power rankings this season. I can't imagine BBE remaining unpicked for too long in the All-Star draft, but if he somehow falls to the third round, he may be the steal of the night.
Donatello - Non Fungible Terrapins
The first of our All-Star centers is none other than the dude, Donatello.
The three-star center and third turtle has put up a fantastic 21/10 for most of the season, while being one of the elite FT shooters in the entire league, let alone from the center position - this has come in serious handy as the more foul-prone bigs in the league have ended up sending Donatello to the line all too often and gifting the NFTurtles a serious advantage. One they can't afford as Donatello is the 6th best offensive rebounder in the league, able to continually give his team second chance opportunities on offense, or simply convert them himself.
On the other end of the floor, the Non Fungible Terrapin's big man in the middle has been picking up opposing centers like a bō staff, swinging them around, and tossing them aside all season long. Sitting at an elite ~3 stocks per game, Donatello also has the 4th most blocks in a single game with 8 - something he's capable of doing to whatever All-Star teams he ends up lining up against.
We always knew Donatello was the smartest of the bunch, but this Donatello might be the true leader as well. 20 points a game, 10 boards, great defense, clutch foul shooting, great BBIQ, and elite leadership...what more could an All-Star captain want?
Admiral Shaqbar - The Robellion
The Robellion's big move to acquire Admiral Shaqbar has paid off for their team during Season 0 and will now pay off for one lucky All-Star captain as well.
The big man has transformed The Robellion, who had hovered around .500 for quite a while, into a dangerous, winning, unit. Shaqbar is putting up 21 points for the Robellion so far on nearly 60% true shooting, which is very good for a center, but so much better for a center who is a legitimate three-level scorer.
Shaqbar can abuse defenses down low as a scorer, as the big man boasts a no-doubt high inside rating. While that's great, and his 2PT efficiency is absolutely notable, it's not necessarily ultra-unique among great bigs. However, when you add in the fact that Shaqbar is a 41% shooter from distance, even at a low-ish volume that makes him so dangerous.
At nearly 12 rebounds per game, Shaqbar isn't just floating around as a big scorer. So far the Robellion's anchor has netted the 15th most double-doubles in the league and boasts a 70% double-double rate, something only two-dozen other swoospters have accomplished.
Admiral Shaqbar is not a trap, he is as good as he looks, and whichever All-Star captain can snag him should find a way to take advantage of this floor stretching beast.
Arvirus Sabonis - Knight Jays
Another floor stretcher is the Knight Jays Arvirus Sabonis, who makes it into the All-Star game as one of the best midrange killer bigs in the league, and one of the greatest examples of a two-star prospect blowing past his expectations.
While Arvirus's 3pt shooting goes up and down over the course of this season, even nearing 40% at some points, his true bread and butter is the in-between game. Sabonis has lived in the 14-18ft range as a shooter this year and has seen him be anywhere from a 22ppg scorer to a 28ppg scorer depending on the context of his team. He's knocking down nearly 52% of his two-point attempts and joins Captain as one of the few big-time scorers to make less than three free throws a game.
Sabonis also chips in heavily as a rebounder at 11 a game, a 65% double-double rate, and a top-20 offensive rebounder in the league. Additionally, Sabonis's 80 interior defense is all-too-overlooked. That is rock solid anchor defense, making Sabonis one of the few players in the league who can score outside of the key like LaMarcus Aldridge, but get down inside the paint and defend like Arvydas.
Mehmet Obrrr - Hirsh's Hoopers
Last but certainly not least is Hirsh's Hoopers monolithic scorer and the fourth unanimous selection into the All-Star game.
Mehmet Obrrr is currently 7th in the league in points per game at 26.7, making him the only pure center averaging over 25 PPG, and one of only three averaging over 22 PPG. Already Obrrr has managed to put up 53 points in a game, be a top-15 FGM player, top-20 in 2PTM per game, and is thriving at the line as well.
While Obrrr has a Brook Lopez-like rebounding profile so far, he's still chipping in eight a game, tossing out a couple assists, and keeping the turnovers to a shocking minimum considering the volume of shots he's taking.
More than anything, Obrrr is doing all of this in only his second season, making him the only sophomore in the All-Star game and setting the initial record for youngest ever All-Star. It even begs the question if we'll ever see another second year player be the leading scorer at their position ever again - although - now that I think about it the two special rookies coming in next year may very well make a play for that.
That wraps up all twenty of our All-Star players for Season 0! I cannot stress enough how difficult these decisions were, there were equally worthy players who absolutely could have made it but just barely missed out, players who would have been so fun to have in the games but couldn't quite swing it, and players who we know are going to have something to say about this come tournament time and look to prove us all wrong. We may be cooking something up to highlight some special players who didn't quite make the cut as well.
Until then, be on the lookout for this weekend's All-Star draft where we will be streaming the selections with our four captains and going over the teams, keep grinding it out to make the Swooper Bowl before the bracket locks in, and get ready for the most jam-packed, electric, intense two weeks in Swoops History!